Ouch!!

This is hard to type. The other day I was turning a corner when I collided with a guy walking in opposite direction. He bounced off a car parked on the pavement I bounced off a brick wall. We both made a quick apology to each other an carried on our way. That's when I noticed that my arm hurt but thought it was just bruised.
The next day I woke up unable to move my arm so a trip to the hospital A+E department. After a couple of x-rays it turns out that I have broken a piece of bone off my elbow.
X-rays have gone all high tech now. The doctor asked me back into the room for a chat and I noticed these two very large computer screens. I looked quickly at one screen and said to the doctor, "I see the problem" and pointed at the screen, "I am not an expert like you but that looks like a foot".
The doctor looked at me witheringly and said, "That's not yours". After a couple of mouse clicks he replaced the foot with my elbow.
Later in the day I was out with friends (by friends I mean people taking the mick out of my sling) when Robsey asked me if I was right or left handed.
"Right" I replied.
He says "Well, you are going to have a problem when you go to the toilet".
"Actually" Says I. "I wanted to have a word with you about that".
"No way am I holding your willy when you go to the toilet". Says he.
"You don't have to". Says I, "Coz, I'm going for a crap".
So there you go. Get well soon messages can be sent the usual way.